Mental health awareness week: Typing tougher than you talk
There has been much news coverage of the suicide of a contestant one week after he appeared on the Jeremy Kyle show and ITV’s response to cancel its highest rated daytime TV programme as a consequence.
Arguably this is too late; two contestants from another popular - and therefore valuable – show, Love Island, have also committed suicide in the last year. ITV’s response to this was markedly different; they had done the necessary follow up after care but this had to come to an end at some point. Other former contestants told a different story; the care you received from ITV was dependent on how popular, and again how valuable, you were to the company.
I’ve watched the Jeremy Kyle story unravel this week and I’m glad ITV took the decision it has done. I cannot stand the programme and I think Jeremy Kyle’s approach has become increasingly aggressive and superior. But I have watched it occasionally with some morbid fascination over the years. While there can be no doubt that they have supported some contestants through rehab and offered counselling, it feels like there is a price to pay before that happens. God only knows what the man who took his own life was subjected to but let’s assume it was pretty horrible. I appreciate that contestants are vetted beforehand but who knows the impact of being berated by a baying audience can have on someone who is already vulnerable and may not have the support network in place to rebound. It all leaves a rather nasty taste in the mouth and while its detractors have been accused of middle class hand wringing by some, including Piers Morgan, being a decent human being and not getting kicks out another person’s shame is not a class issue.
Being humiliated or abused in public is not a new thing for society. But social media provides the platform for some people (so called trolls) to wind people up on purpose and say the most hurtful and outrageous things, all from the safety of behind their computer. I call this typing tougher than you talk. I work in communications and use social media on a daily basis and I enjoy it when it’s used in the spirit that it’s intended. The comms team does see people who use it for the purpose of criticising or hounding someone and this takes time and energy to manage. Even though the tweet isn’t directed at us personally, our job is to protect the Trust’s reputation so we can’t help but be affected by it and I’ve seen the impact it’s had on the people who are being targeted. It’s not nice.
This week I’ve had issues with my phone company, and as the usual complaint route hasn’t worked I very nearly sent a critical tweet but I stopped myself: ‘Lucy, don’t be the person who you don’t like dealing with yourself’ I said and reminded myself there was a person behind the screen whose heart would sink when they read my criticism. I’m a big believer in the power of words but more so I’m a believer in face to face communication trumping anything else on offer as you can detect tone and facial expression.
I’ve found it interesting that the Jeremy Kyle issues has escalated during Mental Health Awareness week, and though I’ve not seen any direct mention of this in any of the articles I’ve read I do think it’s the best publicity the campaign could have hoped for: It’s served as a reminder that using people for entertainment is wrong and tempering what you say, considering the impact you have on others, not being judgemental and seeking to understand rather than criticise helps us all, not just those who have mental ill health. In short, you never know what someone is going through, so always be kind.
Lucy Kearney, Head of Communications and Engagement at Newham Hospital